Working alone is in my comfort zone and I am a cooperative learning enthusiast!
Every time I walk into a classroom, I look for opportunities to get students to do the work of learning together.
Light bulb moments, new ideas, inspiration, realization, revelation… So many ways to describe what happens when two or more minds are in sync. It’s learning magic!
And yet, I set up boundaries for my work. Looking for alone time to get things done. Working with colleagues requires a higher skill set, and more energy, and is almost always less efficient.
It’s also just plain uncomfortable. Here are just eight reasons I’d rather work alone despite everything I know about the value of cooperative learning:
I’d rather work alone because…
- I’d rather work alone because I’m not willing to take on your failures.
- I’d rather work alone because I care more about a job well done than building a partnership.
- I’d rather work alone because I’m not sure you have anything of value to offer.
- I’d rather work alone because the only person I can trust is myself.
- I’d rather work alone because I know I will always do a better job than you will.
- I’d rather work alone because I don’t have time to help you figure it out.
- I’d rather work alone because I don’t need any help.
- I’d rather work alone because this job is too important to make mistakes.
Yikes.
Sometimes it’s not such a fun thing to do some honest self-reflection. And yet, even as those words came flowing out onto the page, I felt of sense of relief. Maybe we all feel this way, or maybe I am a control freak and a perfectionist. Probably both of those things are true.
We teach best what we most need to learn.
Richard Bach
A New Definition of Safety
Classrooms are places where control and perfectionism have lived quite comfortably since around the time of, I don’t know, one-room schoolhouses.
But we forget that joy is not found in control or perfection.
Sure, we need safe places where people can learn. Heck, we need safe places period. Shouldn’t everywhere be a safe place? Maybe we need to redefine our idea of safety, and maybe it doesn’t have a whole lot to do with control.
Self-awareness is such a great way to start our discussions about safety and control.
Using an empowerment tool like the My Circle of Control worksheet either in classrooms or for ourselves is a practical and visual way to ask yourself some questions about your own sense of control and even reveal your ideas about perfection. Using it along with This big list of things I can control shifts our perspective because it allows us to see that we actually do have control over the things that are most important.
Not only does it empower you to let go of lots of heavy baggage that serves little purpose in your life, but also it gives you permission to set up your own definition of safety.
For me, it feels safe to know that I am curious and will make mistakes. That I can ask for help, try new things, and be honest. It feels safe to know that I am a work in progress, will never be perfect, and even that I can rely on imperfect other people.
Two Reasons to Work Together
Let’s reframe those 8 reasons we would rather work alone and change our perspective. Learning should be fun, and it’s okay if it’s a little uncomfortable sometimes too. Also, two is easier to remember than eight, and it can really be summed up with the following:
- Finished is better than perfect
- Nothing is ever finished, so nothing will ever be perfect.
Now that you are armed with these two reasons to work with others and get things done, try to have a little fun at the same time!